Wednesday, August 18, 2010

How should I handle this situation with my girlfriend UPDATED?

Well my girlfriend used to be all over me, telling me she loved me all the time and wanting me to come over and chill. Lately (the past week) shes been sort of ';out of place'; ill call it. I dont know what it is. She doesnt ever want to have sex anymore, she doesnt care about anything, and shes been in a sort of sad mood. Today I got fed up with it and asked her if she even wanted to be with me anymore. She replied something along the lines of I dont know what I want anymore, Ive become someone who just doesnt care. So I gave it some thought and I decided I was going to break up with her and give her some space. When trying this she didnt want me to break up with her. She thinks I question her too much, which I dont see a problem with because if I didnt ask questions once in a while how would I find anything out you know? What should I do about this situation this is the first real relationship ive ever had and I want it to work out.


She talks about her ex sometimes, its never anything good but he comes up a lot and I dont like it. He was quite the jerk to her and she tells me she doesnt want him back but its hard to forget him because hes the first person she ever really loved, she wants me. Heres the catch, I live 2 hours away and only get to see her on the weekends and I usually stay the night. She tells me things would be so much better if i just lived in the same town so she could see me everyday. I graduate high school this june and in the summer ill be able to come over a lot more and in August im going to college in the town where she lives (shes not going to college so shes not going anywhere) so then I will see her everyday. I keep telling her to wait and so far its worked but lately it seems to have lost its magic.How should I handle this situation with my girlfriend UPDATED?
If she's on birth control, that could be one of the things bringing her down. If she's been talking about her ex a lot, try to step back from the situation and just ask what has her thinking about him- giving her the option of not talking about it if she's not comfortable with it. Be understanding. She's probably depressed, and although she doesn't want you to go, doesn't know what to do with herself and is under threat of becoming stagnant and dwelling even more on the past. If you know her schedule, maybe try setting up or appearing spontaneously at her place and going out to do something fun. Be enthusiastic, but not overly so- maybe you can help shake her out of her funk. Just be sure not to do anything that could distress her more, just be honest and supportive.

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